Not sure what to sext? Here’s the best sexting guide for newbies.

I’m sure you’ve received a text where you went, “Huh?” It’s not always easy to send the right context or meaning through text, as there aren’t any physical cues you can use to understand the message completely.

When it comes to sexting, though, you need to send the right message and leave no room for misinterpretation; you don’t want to mess up sexytime. If you’ve never sexted before, there are some things you need to know in order to not only send scintillating messages, but also how to take the right pic, and how to initiate the real thing after you’ve sexted.

First off, let’s go over the format, not the content, of the messages. I’ll leave the content up to you, as that’s your job to create something to keep your partner entertained, but you also need to maintain the style that sexting requires.

When you sext, there’s really only a few things you can do: say what you’d do to them, ask them what they’d do to you, and where you’d do that stuff together. Sexting is like batting practice for sex; you get to take full swings like it’s the real deal, but the pitches are thrown a lot softer and there’s no real consequences for bad contact.

Now, when you’re starting things off, maybe you’ll talk about what you’d do to them to get the heat going; that’s great and all, but you need to keep things short and dirty. No sext should ever be in paragraph form, so if you have more to say, let them respond first and just adjust your message accordingly.

Sexting is all about creating a virtual connection between the two of you, so you need to share the effort, rather than do all of the heavy lifting yourself. Even if you have something great you’d like to add, give them a moment to respond, possibly with something even better than what you’d cooked up.

Sexting, just like texting, is meant to be short and sweet. Great, you have some dirty things to share, but your partner could have something even hotter.

Now it’s about time we go over those nudes. They actually don’t have to be nudes, as you can easily take a sexy selfie in a shirt or lingerie or something of that nature.

That’s where a lot of people get it wrong; you don’t have to be completely naked in the pics you send to whoever you’re sexting. You can even have all of your clothes on, but slip something down or up a little to show some skin and make your partner start to sweat.

Dudes, I know you think she really wants a dick pic, but unless she asks for one, she doesn’t want it. Let me repeat that: don’t send a dick pic unless a dick was asked for.

If you’re gonna take a pic of it, don’t just hold your phone directly over it; send a full body pic and show whatever else you’ve got. That’s a good deal better than her having to look at a ghost dick on her phone, wondering who it really belongs to.

Ladies, basically any picture you take will be received with open arms. Women are beautiful, and us guys really love looking at women.

Send us a nude, send us a pic in a bikini or bra, send us a pic just with everything on point; that’s all we need, honestly. It can be your booty, or you in a little black number, as a woman, you have all the power to turn us on, and basically no matter what you do, it’ll work.

Oh, back to the dudes for a second - if you’re gonna take that dick pic, consider keeping your boxer briefs on and pull an Anthony Weiner. Just avoid the whole ‘everyone-saw-his-dick-on-the-internet’ deal.

In the tech world we live in today, photos seem to save themselves, and sometimes those photos come back to bite the photo taker in the ass. To prevent any kind of photo leak, delete any photos that are on the cloud, which isn’t as safe of a place as we’d like.

When you sext with someone, the best policy is to just delete it all- photos, messages, videos, the lot. If they’re all deleted, nothing will muddy up your life later (even if you want to keep any of the sexting content for a rainy day, just delete it all for safety’s sake).

If you feel like going back and deleting everything is too much of a hassle, give Snapchat a try. It’s free, very easy to use, and everything you send is deleted forever and ever within ten seconds of the receiver viewing the message or pic (or ‘snap’ as it’s referred to when using the app).

Honestly, Snapchat is a great place to sext, as the ten second time limit to look at a pic can help make things even spicier. If you can’t see everything in the pic or it’s only a few seconds long (you can have the photo expire after 1-10 seconds), your mind will imagine all of the rest for you, and the mind goes to great lengths to create the image it wants to see.

If you only have a couple seconds to enjoy a sexy snap, you’ll cherish it more and it’ll make every correspondence sexy and exciting, as you don't know what you’ll get, or for how long.

It’s about time we go over when to move on from sexting to the real deal; go from the minors to the big leagues real quick, real quick. In case you were wondering, “Wanna bang now?” won’t cut it.

You gotta just let it happen naturally; if you were gonna get laid, you were gonna get laid. If it was gonna happen, it would happen. But, in case it feels like the sexting is coming to a close but you think both parties still want some more, ask them to show off their skills in person.

You want to seem inviting without sounding like you’re really thirsty, which isn’t very easy in a situation like this. Give them a reason to come over, or for you two to meet up.

Sexting isn’t difficult to get a hang of once you give it a try. If you go with the flow and follow your instincts (or just follow their lead), you should do just fine.


Kylie is online and wants to sext.